Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

You know what I want for Christmas? A bigger house, preferably on a few acres. I would love a minivan. I would love to have a bigger savings account, especially after the year we’ve had. I would love to have a bigger kitchen with a big island so I could prepare meals for my family, our families, and our friends. I would love to fill up my living room with tons of presents for my daughter and husband this Christmas. I would love to buy extravagant gifts for all of my friends and family. I want. I want. I want. 

This year our house completely fell apart in *almost* every single way a month before Ruby was born. It was truly one of the most stressful times of our life in every sense. Something happened in the middle of that which has stayed with me, and I think about it often especially when I find myself wanting more. 

We had to hire out someone to reinstall floors throughout our entire house due to the extent of the water damage. God used and provided a very sweet young man named Vidal to help us. Aside from the fact that he did an amazing job, it was what he said that stuck with me this past year. We live in a less than 1200 square foot home in a little neighborhood surrounded by homes much like ours. It feels so tight so much of the time. When Vidal was here working, I said, “I am so sorry our house is so small.” He said, “Your house is not small; your house is big.” Talk about a fat dose of conviction, perspective, and humility slapping me right across the face, which is largely what I need every single day. 

Last week at church, we talked about how our hearts are idol factories. I’ve spent a lot of my time over the last week identifying the idols in my life, praying, and asking God how I can work to eliminate those idols. A very timely message, especially around Christmas. A time where it’s very easy to get sucked into wanting and often feeling like you NEED more. 

In the spirit of true transparency, the amount of times I jump on social media and get jealous of people my age who are in these beautiful, big houses is more than I care to count. Hence why I often delete my social media apps. I won’t get into my stance on social media, but I will say this: I have no business being jealous. I truly have every single thing I need. First and foremost, I have a Savior Who died on the cross for my sins. I have a husband who loves me more than he loves himself. I have a beautiful daughter whom I have spent years praying for. I have a wonderful family; Josh has a wonderful family. I have amazing friends who would drop anything if I needed them. I have a cute, yellow house. We have cars that run. I have food in my fridge. I have clothes in my closet. God, thank You for those blessings. 

It says this in 1 Timothy 6:6-10, “But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.” ‭‭

Notice this passage in the Bible…if we have food and clothing, we should be content. It doesn’t even list shelter. Convicting in my heart… to say the least. 

My prayer this Christmas (and this upcoming year) is that my eyes would be centered on the One who has blessed me with far more than I deserve, that distraction would be minimized, that I would be in constant communication with God to remove the idols in my heart, and lastly, that I would be content in our quiet, little Christmas. Because of Jesus and His blood shed for me, I truly have everything I need.